11.02.2011

What is the quality of your Self-Image, Self-Esteem and Self-Worth?



Guest Post by Latonia Muhammad

As an adult it’s normal to evaluate your self-image, self-esteem or self-worth. It’s called self-improvement, which is the basis for community development. Everyone has room for improvement. We encounter people all the time that look like they have it all together or don’t have it at all.

Before we continue let’s take a quick quiz. This is not gender related and there is no right or wrong answer; just room for improvement. No one is looking so answer the following questions honestly.

1. Do people give you compliments?
2. Do you give compliments to others?
3. Do you doubt yourself in making decisions?
4. Do you always ask friends how do you look, when you like how you look?
5. Do you need validation to do something you desire to do?
6. When someone asks you to talk about yourself do you draw a blank?
7. Are you afraid to go out to dinner or a public place alone?
8. Do you compare your success or lack of to others?
9. Do you negate yourself to please others?
10. When you are alone with yourself are you comfortable with your thoughts about you?

After answering the above questions you have a starting point to assess your self esteem. Having a healthy perception of self is imperative to your personal success as well as your success in relating to others. Where do our self image, esteem and value come from? There are several common answers to this question, I will list a few. Parents, family, self, peers, role models, books as well as teachers and people who inspire us throughout our lives.

Very good answers and yes we are influenced in one way or another. However, we have to go further and dig a little deeper to get to the root of where self esteem/image originated.

Esteem is defined as respect and honor also to regard favorably. Image is defined as a visible representation. So now the most important question is How do I see myself and by whose standard am I judging my actions? We have all heard or read that we are made in the image of God. With that being the case whose characteristics should be the standard in which we give value to ourselves? What a perfect standard. Let’s identify some of God’s characteristics or attributes: The Patient, The Merciful, The Forgiving, The Peaceful, The Honorable, The Truthful, The Compassionate, The Gracious, The Kind, The Grateful, The Forbearing, The Wise, The Nourisher, The Just, The Sublime, The Loving, The Strong, The Friend, The Praise Worthy, The Generous and The Defender, just to name a few. Take a moment to envision you in the image of the most exalted characteristics. Your self image will be contagious because you will set the trend of being the best you that you can be. Your value will become priceless. Your challenge for the next 7 days is to,

1. Write down 5 characteristic you admire about yourself and state why. Repeat them out loud in a mirror for the next 7 days and remember to state why.
2. Second write the most annoying thing about you and state why. Next to that write down what you are going to do to change it. Repeat the change in the mirror for the next 7 days. You must practice the change as well.
3. Before you leave home compliment yourself, then compliment a least one person per day for the next 7 days.
4. Let’s try to understand others for the sake of peace. Muslims read something from the Holy Bible for 15mins per day for the next 7 days. Christians read something from the Holy Quran for 15 per day for the next 7 days. Then dialogue with each other to build new relationships.
5. Last but not least report your progress on the blog so we can share in your personal success! I look forward to hearing from you.

~Magnificent the expressionist 

(Follow Latonia Muhammad on Twitter @LMuhammad)

8 comments:

  1. This is a WONDERFUL blog! I answered all of the questions and I look forward to the follow up article.

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  2. I wonder how much the Willie Lynch syndrome plays into our low self-image??

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  3. That first questions is crucial. These days we don't compliment one another. We're too busy sizing up one another and being envious.

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  4. Great article. Latonia did you do all of these questions your self? How did it help you?

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  5. Dear Anonymous,
    Thank you for your comment. I am honored to know that you participated in answering the questions regarding your self value. It takes courage to look in the mirror to acknowledge the truth about self, the good and the not so good. You are one of my heroes. The follow up article is coming soon. Please don't stop working on you. It's an adventure.

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  6. Dear Anonymous,

    Thank you for your comment. Our low self image is an undeniable reality that stimulated from the teaching of Willie Lynch. We as a people have not healed from 400 years of chattle slavery. That process of making up slaves tainted the psychological make up of Black people. Howvever we have "The Good News" that the bible speaks about. God is concerned with our affairs and he's going to make us a great people through the renewal of the mind. We have to take off the old man and put on the new.

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  7. Dear Gloria,
    Thank you for your comment. You have a vaild point. We are a broken poeple that struggle with diseases of the heart,envy and jealousy. But there is hope. When an individual can find something good on the inside it is easy to find something good on the outside in others. It is a process of learning how to love self. This world paints black people as uncivlized and savage. However that is not our nature. We are from God and if we are from God we can display his attributes. The love of self and kind must be taught to us from a divine teachings to restore our nature.

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  8. Dear Freewoman,
    Thank you for your comment. Yes maam, I did wtrite and answer these questions myself. This article is a testimony of my own journey with low self-esteem. Growing up I never felt like I belonged,it was so bad that as a teenager I couldn't look at myself in the mirror with out the feeling of shame and nothingness. I felt empty on the inside. I tried all of the latest fashhions, make-up, dated the popular guys in hope that something would change. It never did. At the age of 19,I became suicidal because I felt that I had no reason to live. But in 1997 I became a Muslim follower of the teachings of the Honorable Elijah Muhammad, under the leadership of the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan. I began to study the science of life, culture, refinement, the pursuit of happines and the nature of God and black people which gave me a proper view of myself. It was like God throwing me a life line. Fourteen years later I can look in the mirror and tell myself,"I love you" and mean it. I strive to give everyone who enters my presence a compliment especially women because,it help other to know that someone sees the good in them.

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